Christmas party, alcohol tears and unexplained objects next morning

So how can you tell if it was a good office party? I think mine was - here is the evidence:

• I wake up on my sofa in last nights clothes
  
• I have a hangover
  
• Memory is sketching
  
• What I do remember I am trying to block out
  
• I seem to have a mans watch stuck on my wrist.Incidentally this does not make showering easy.

I think some rules I suggested were:

• Don't drink too much
  
• Don't demonstrate special skills - these include pole dancing putting my legs behind my head or speed of bra removal
  
• Do not insult Ted. I have my appraisal next week - behave...
  
• Don't flirt
  
• Don't do anything stupid with Jamie or anyone else. (for a full list of rules visit here

Well Jamie is still sick so disappointing on the man front. He texts me and said he would be sorry to miss out and we would do something next week but... there goes my mistletoe moment.

Our party starts with a meal - nice sensible and civilised you might think. Wrong we start with a glass of champagne each. Rob Simon and I quickly steal and hide two of the bottles and pass extra under the tables. Andi notices and joins in.

We are then given wine with our meal and by the time it gets to dessert we are pretty.... happy.

At this point the secret Santa gifts are unwrapped. I won't go through all of them but highlights include Robs gift to Ted which was a Mexican bandit outfit. Ted rather drunk and red at this point immediately wears it and insists that we all call him Teduardo for the evening. I buy Rob a book of 101 cheesy chat up lines and an arse face towel. And Laura buys me a huge tray of chocolates.

After the meal we split into two groups - the sensible half and the bad influences. Guess which half I fall into? So Me, Simon, Rob, Andi, Ethan, Ted, Laura and a few of the journalists pile into the pub

After a few more glasses of wine and some tequila shots I am feeling decidedly dizzy. I have talked to ted for a while and I seem to remember telling him that nasal trimmers are just the thing for the modern man.
Is that my pay rise I seem slipping away....

I notice Rob and Laura talking and her suddenly bursting into tears. Andi and I exchange glances and follow. It turns out white wine just makes her teary. How funny I think and then see Andi start crying.

I am a bit shocked at all this crying and then to my horror tear up myself. Which turns into Andi Laura and I having a giggling tearful group hug which is interrupted by Simon and Fishy who both look terrified which makes me and Andi burst out laughing

Laura quickly dishes out cigarettes to herself and Andi. She is about to offer me one when Simon gives me one.

He actually lights it for me and then gives it to me which i find pretty cool and gives me his coat to keep warm.

To be continued .... it was a long night.....